Another interesting day at the 'ol nursing home. I just realized tonight that I've only seen two men as residents since we moved Mom in, which probably substantiates the claim that women outlive men. Sorry guys. Although it may not be a bad thing guys because you miss out on the interesting dementia behavior that seems to befall most 80 somethings. I visited Mom after 6pm this evening. I had forgotten about a little syndrome known as "sundowner's." Some people with dementia have a heightening of their symptoms at night. Other people who don't exhibit symptoms of dementia during the day will experience them at night. There seemed to be a sundowner's convention this evening. I was stopped by 3 ladies in the hall all trying to find their way to their rooms. Ruth was pacing and smoothing the wallpaper as she went. Lois was carrying her belongings in a basket trying to find a place to put them. Lois is the same lady that keeps trying to get into Mom's bed. Fortunately she hasn't tried when Mom was in it. I felt like I was in a movie. I stood at the end of the hall and watched this seemingly deliberate behavior but knowing in my mind that there was nothing deliberate about it. It's painful to watch, and it's hard to know how painful emotionally it is for them because they cannot clearly verbalize their inner feelings. I like to think that they are happily oblivious as to their state of mind.
Tonight is shower night. I got the wrinkled nose look from Mom. She doesn't like the shower. It has too many rooms and you have to run like hell to get out of there when your done. So she says. I really would like to see her run like hell. I tried to convince her to grin and bear it because it was a necessity, all the while thinking that I would hate it too. I had the aides show me the shower room. It's probably a step up from a prison shower. At least it has a curtain. The loss of control one must feel in that situation must be unbearable.
Patti's TOTD #13: Treat your elders with the respect they deserve. They aren't being slow just to piss you off. Keep in mind at all times that you too will be in their shoes one day. Most importantly don't talk down to them. They aren't idiots, they are old and probably wiser than you will ever be.
PS: Joe gives this a thumbs up.
3 comments:
I just bought a new computer and was having some minor problems with it. I drove it to the local Micro Center for service. I noticed two older gentlemen getting in their car in the row in front of me and didn't think too much about it. As I was lifting the computer out of my truck I heard a horn toot. Now my computer isn't a laptop but a very large destop model. Anyways its the two old guys in the car. They didn't want to back out of the spot they were in or they forgot where reverse was so they figured that they would just pull through the spot where I was standing holding this large computer box. I thought of dad and how he got out of his car one time when some one tooted at him at a stop light. He went back to ask them what they wanted. I know he did it just to piss them off. I wanted to do the same but I thought better of it. I did take a little extra time in closing the door and walking out of the vacant spot though.
After spending a few winters with the snowbirds in Florida, I can say with 100% certainty that they can't back up. Their necks and backs are so stiff, they can't turn their heads to look behind them. If they do back up it's a Hail Mary play. They just go for it and hope for the best.
Hilarious! I pray for Jax when I'm that age!
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