Hang Man

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Ball Of Negativity

It's 3:30am and I can't get back to sleep. I had a bad dream about something invisible touching my hand while I was in the garage at the house I grew up in. Weird!!!! Once I woke up I couldn't get back to sleep ruminating over everything....Mom, the Labor Day party, being 50, kids, grand kids, sagging neck, etc... Pretty much everything I have no control over. I'm normally pretty good about letting things go that I can't change, but only after I've bitched about it for awhile. Lately though I seem to hold onto all of the negative aspects without looking at the positive side. I think it's because so many things are happening at once so it's all becoming one big negative ball rolling downhill. How do I stop the ball without getting rolled over? Ok...for every negative thought I will verbally state a positive thought.

I'll start with a biggie: (-) The Mom that I've known and loved my whole life is not there anymore.
(+) I have the opportunity to take care of my mother like she took care of me growing up.

(-)I feel overwhelmed with "stuff", unorganized and cluttered. I'm sick of so much stuff.
(+) I am thankful that I have things surrounding me that hold memories and I am most thankful for the people that made those memories.

(-) You're only as happy as your unhappiest child. Why can't I fix everything for my children and keep my grandchildren safe.
(+) If I try and fix everything they would never become strong independent individuals. They have to live and make mistakes on their own. As much as it hurts sometimes, I have to let them. My kids (that includes step-kids) are strong, independent, responsible, loving and incredible! They impress me every day.

(-) I'm getting older. I hate it. I hate everything about it. It's cruel.
(+) I'm alive, in good health and all of my needs are met. I'm the luckiest girl in the world!

(-) I have so much to do for the party. What if I forget something? What if I do something wrong and piss someone off? It has to be perfect.
(+) Nothing is ever perfect. It's the flaws that make it memorable. My family is going to be together so no matter what it's going to be great!

(-)My skin is aging. My chin is sagging. Nothing is where it used to be. I feel strong and confident on the inside but the outside packaging is not as good as it used to be.
(+) I got nothin!......Oh, here's something: At least I know a good plastic surgeon.

This is something I came across awhile ago and I'm always preaching it to my kids because I believe it to be true. I need to take my own advice.

"The law of emotion states that any thought held in the mind and charged with emotion is rapidly accepted by the subconscious mind, activating all the other mental laws, turning inner though into outer reality." So in other words, don't be a negative Nellie!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

the trail of life is as hard or easy as you make it, enjoy your hike.

Patti said...

I like that!

Lauren said...

My favorite is (want a tatto of it in french actually): Even the smoothest road has bumps. So, nothing is perfect. We are all looking forward to seeing you and everyone else over Labor Day weekend! Even if you did NOTHING, it would be great just to see everyone!

Plastic surgery is around for a reason ;) Have at it! Not that you need it (at all), I'm just saying...