Surprise!

It Will Never Change

I had a hard time getting to sleep again last night. No, it wasn't because of the bed. It's because of Sandra Bullock. I feel so bad for her! She seems so open and genuine that I feel like I know her. She's the type of woman I would love to have as a best friend. What was her husband thinking?????? If you saw the Oscars, she made the most touching acceptance speech; talking about how her husband has her back. They showed Jesse and he had tears in his eyes. At the time I thought they were tears of love and devotion. It turns out they were tears of: "Oh shit I am in such trouble."

I do give him credit for admitting his mistake right off. It's the people that deny, deny, deny (like John Edwards) that I have the most disdain for. It's humiliating enough for the spouse in the first place and continuing to lie prolongs the agony.

This is for all of the famous people that cheat and think they can get away with it: "REALLY!!!!!" First of all, be a little more particular in your choices. Slutty down on their luck models and waitresses will do anything to make money, including sell you out. You would think that would be common sense, but apparently not.

Normally I don't care what you celebrity types do, but don't mess with Sandra Bullock.

Do What You Gotta Do For The Sake Of Sleep

I have evil drapes and they may be ruining my marriage.

I bought some drapes for the windows in the bedroom at the condo. Previously there was nothing there. I liked the view and it was nice to wake up and have the ocean be the first thing I laid my eyes on in the morning. Joe, however; was disturbed by the fact that as soon as the sun came up he would wake up. Being the ever subservient and dutiful wife that I am, I bought some drapes so Joe might be able to sleep a little later in the morning.

Since I have installed the drapes I have not been able to sleep, averaging only two to three hours over each of the last three nights. I am convinced that the drapes are to blame. It could have something to do with the size of the bed and my fluctuating body temperature as well, but it's easier to blame the drapes.

When we first bought the condo and needed a bed, we figured since we weren't down here that much we would buy a queen size bed and save some money. We are used to a king size. That was a big mistake. Between me, Joe and the dog we barely fit. It doesn't help that I am now having a harder time controlling my body temperature (yes it's menopause ass holes). Joe puts off enough body heat to make a family of three comfortable. It's like sleeping next to an oven set at 400 degrees with the door open.

So, it's finally happened. We have become that couple. You know, the couple that everyone feels sorry for because they are sleeping in separate beds. The couple that you assume must have major problems if they don't even sleep in the same bed. I finally get it. While I'm sure the aforementioned may be true in some cases, more than likely the couple are in that situation for practical reasons. There is nothing worse than sleep deprivation. Having a grumpy sleep deprived spouse is no way to live.

We slept apart last night and.......we both slept like babies. Well maybe not babies. We slept like a man having to get up and go to the bathroom every two hours and a woman with hot flashes having to put the cover on or off every two hours. So, for us we slept well!

I assume that once we get home to our king size bed everything will go back to normal. For now we will be apart for the sake of sleep.

"Good night Joe". "Good night Patti". "Good night Ellie". "Good night John Boy." "Who?" "Never mind, go to sleep."

I Need Me Some Eggs

These last two weeks can't go by fast enough. I hate to wish my life away, but I need to get home. Yah, I miss everyone terribly but what I really miss are my eggs. Yes, my eggs from my chickens.

I remember when I first tried fresh eggs from a friends chickens, I couldn't eat them. Part of the problem from those eggs was that they were from Araucana chickens which lay blue eggs. In addition, whatever they fed them turned their yolks an almost neon yellow. They just seemed a little unnatural. So when I decided to raise chickens of my own I was a little worried that I wouldn't be able to eat their eggs. That worry didn't last long when I tried them. It is amazing to me how much better they taste than store bought eggs.

I brought some of my girls eggs to Florida with me, but they are now gone. I actually had to buy old white eggs from the grocery. When I say old, I mean old. Grocery store eggs are probably already four weeks old by the time they are purchased by the consumer and most of their flavor is gone. I had one egg from my chickens left and the store bought eggs. I cooked them side by side. Their was no comparison. The funny thing now is that it grosses me out to eat the store bought eggs now that I know more about them and have had fresh eggs.

I'm only kidding about missing my eggs more than my family. The egg shortage is no where near the creamer fiasco which was close to a matter of life and death. If you don't know what I'm talking about with the creamer thing, then you haven't been following my blog. My blog is like a TV show; you have to read every post or you won't be able to follow the convoluted story line of randomness.

Any who.... I'm missing my girls and their ova.

Fun On The Waterways

From My Videos

Happy Anniversary

10 years, TEN YEARS, X years,IIIIIIIIII YEARS. Joe has actually put up with me for 10 years of marriage. Honestly, they have been 10 pretty easy years relatively free of conflict and turmoil. Anyone that says their marriage is perfect is a big fat liar, but as far as marriage goes mine is pretty perfect for me. Joe knows how not to push my buttons. That is a good skill to have since once my button is pushed it's hard to shut it off. I will definitely admit that I am the more emotional of the two of us. Joe tends to keep things in, but when he does blow it's not a pretty sight. Since most people have never seen that side of him it's kind of shocking if they happen to witness it. I find it a little funny because he's not very good at being mad. His normal demeanor and being mad just don't go together. It's like watching a newborn calf walk for the first time.

Joe and I met when I started working at the Rehab Hospital right after I graduated from nursing school. He would do rounds at the hospital and he was always so nice to me and and all of the staff (not like a lot of the doctors that think they are above everyone). Whenever he showed up I always tried to make sure I made myself available in case he needed anything. We bonded one day discussing some patients scrotum. (To some people that may seem weird, but to medical people it's totally a normal conversation).

One day I was at my med cart with a couple of other nurses. Joe was alone in the dictation room. I told my fellow nurses I was going to ask him out. None of us knew if he was married or not. I tried to do research but apparently Joe was a pretty private person because no one seemed to have any scoop. I got up my nerve and walked straight in to the dictation room. I asked him out, he gave me his answer, I went back to my med cart. My fellow nurses stood there with mouths open; not believing I really did it. "What did he say????" "He said no." "Oh my gosh, really?" "He said he was flattered but he has a girlfriend."

I was disappointed, but I thought it was really noble of him to not betray his girlfriend. It was also liberating to be the one asking for a date instead of the one only going out with the idiots that were asking me. I had recently dated a guy that I ended up having to get a restraining order on. Obviously the story does not end there.

I started dating a guy that I knew from high school. I think I figured he would be safe since I'd known him a long time. They used to call him "lyin Brian". I knew about that nickname, but for some reason I ignored the implications. He truly was the biggest liar that I had ever met. He would lie about stuff that didn't even need to be lied about. In the beginning I ignored it. I knew in the back of my mind that this guy was bad for me, but I hung in there for 10 months. Thank God I had the strength and sense to kick him to the curb. During those 10 months I had switched jobs and was now working at Parkview in the Surgical Trauma Intensive Care.

I didn't have the opportunity to see Joe anymore since I now worked on the other side of town and honestly I hadn't really thought about it anymore. One day I was in a room with a patient and I see Joe walk by the door. I called out to him, but he didn't hear me (little did I know that him not hearing me would become a pattern). I came out of the room and hollered at him down the hall. He and everyone else heard me and he turned around. We chatted for a moment and he says: "remember a while back you asked me out?" "Yah". "Are you still interested?" "Sure." I gave him my phone number.

Two weeks later he finally calls me (knowing him now, I am sure he over thought that decision for those two weeks. He doesn't do things spur of the moment). We finally went on our first date (which discussing it with Joe now, neither of us remember. We're pretty sure that it was dinner and a movie). When he came to my house to pick me up Amanda answered the door. Amanda would have been about 14. She came upstairs to get me and says: "there is a grandpa at the door." Hilarious! The rest is history.

I found out later that he was actually looking for me at Parkview that day. It wasn't a chance meeting. That sly dog!

So Happy Anniversary to us! And here's to many more, CHEERS!

Shells

Joe and I took an evening walk and picked up some shell on the beach. I brought them back and put them in a cup of water to soak awhile and clean them up. A few hours later I rinsed them and put them on the counter to drain. That night I happened to glace at the shells and I noticed that one of the shells was about a foot away from the rest of the shells. I notice the little wet trail and then I see the antennas. IT'S ALIVE!!!

I had grabbed a shell that still had a creature in it. It's easy to tell if you have a normal size shell whether or not there is an animal in it. The shells on our beach are teeny tiny (pea size and smaller) so it's not as easy to tell.

I couldn't let the little guy die, so I put on my robe, grabbed the flash light and headed for the beach. The tide was out so I had to find a moist area to put him in. Do you know how dark it is on the beach at night?? It's darker than dark. It's can't see your hand in front of your face dark! It's run as fast as you can back to the condo dark! I hope little snail dude appreciates this.

These are some shells I have collected. They are all the same kind of shell just different sizes. I love the teeny ones!

I Should Have Left It Alone

Addendum to yesterday's post.

I decided I needed to finish at least some of the chores I started. I finished sweeping the carpet and the tile.

(Side note: Do not under any circumstances install white or beige or any light colored tile flooring. Unless of course you like sweeping or if you have a maid. It shows every hair and every crumb. I hate it!) back to the story....

I thought I should tackle the light fixture in the kitchen that I ignored before. The light fixture is actually florescent tube lights that are covered by a drop ceiling with semi transparent plastic tiles. I have installed a drop ceiling before so I know how it works. I figured this would be a piece of cake. I removed the tiles with no problem and cleaned them.

(Another side note: I have to sweep the floor again since everything that was on top of the tiles fell on the floor. Poor planning on my part.)

So I am attempting to put the tiles back and I get one tile in ok. I start to put in the second tile and everything fell down on my head; track and all. I got the track put back together and reinstalled and began putting the tiles back in again. This time everything fell down on my head and one of the plastic tiles broke. Perfect! Another attempt.....fell down again. On my last attempt I had three of the four tiles in and again everything fell down and another tile broke. I give up!!!!!

Now I have to drive 80 miles round trip to visit a Lowes to buy two pieces of $2 tiles. I could go to Home Depot which would shave off about 10 miles of my trip, but they pissed me off once so I refuse to shop there.

You've heard of the sayings: "let sleeping dogs lie", Leave well enough alone, If it's not broke don't fix it, and Don't a poke a skunk. Those pretty much sum up what I should have done (or not done) in regards to the ceiling tiles.

Inside My Head

I noticed that my crochet stuff was all a mess on the floor, so I decided I would straighten it up. I started straightening and noticed the flowers I had crocheted last night. I stopped straightening and started to match buttons to my flowers to see what looked good. Couldn't pick a button, but decided that I needed a hat pattern to crochet that the flowers would look good on, so I went to the Internet. Before looking for patterns I checked my email and Facebook. I figured I would check on the hat pattern later. I pick up some of the trash that I gathered from my crochet area and went to throw it away. I saw that a pan on the stove needed washed so I put down the trash (on the counter) and took the pan to the sink. I saw that the counter was dirty so I started washing it and decided that there is too much stuff sitting around so I started to put things in cupboards and I noticed that there are finger prints all over the cupboard doors. I proceed to wipe them down. I look up and see bugs in the light fixture and I decide I am going to clean out the bugs. My mind suddenly switches to the fact that I could paint the cupboards. Maybe not completely, but I could put designs on them. Maybe even paint one door with chalk board paint. I go back to organizing and I find a cookbook. I spend probably 5 minutes looking up recipes. I wipe off the bookshelf and take the talking parrot that normally sits on top and I take it outside to the deck. I play with it for awhile. Then I just sit and look out at the water. I remember I was cleaning. I start to vacuum. I get the carpets halfway done when I think of an idea for my blog. I decide that instead of forgetting it I would type it right then.

After spending approximately one hour on the computer blogging about Windows 7 and googling whether or not I was the only one that thought that about Microsoft commercials (FYI I'm not the only one) and looking up everything that popped into my head...... I never finished cleaning up my crochet, never got a hat pattern, forgot to put the trash in the trash can and never even attempted to clean the bugs from the light. The cupboards are half clean as is the floor and the pan is still in the sink. Over the coarse of two hours I never really accomplished anything except write my blog.

Can you spell ADHD.

Wondering About What Doesn't Matter

Do you ever spend way too much time wondering about things that don't matter one little bit?

I want to know something about the Microsoft Windows 7 commercial. They have all of these people taking credit for inventing Windows 7, and they show flashbacks of when they came up with the idea. Why are the people in the flashbacks different looking than the actual people? Are they the same people with more makeup or are they different people all together? If they are different people, then why? It makes no sense to me.

Here is one more thing that perplexes me: How come sometimes my pen works when I write in my check register and sometimes it doesn't. (It's not the pen either because it will write on other paper, just not the checkbook register.)

The Theme Is.....Random

I think my Internet connection works or doesn't work based on the weather. I know it sound weird, but yesterday it was really really windy and the connection was slow and sometimes wouldn't even connect. The weather today is calm and it works like normal. It's a total wireless connection so maybe there is some truth to that. I'm going to take advantage of it while I can.

As I participate in my everyday life, things come up and I think: "ooh I'm going to have to blog about that". I forget a lot of stories by the time I'm sitting in front of my computer ready to type. My blogging life has now seeped into my dreams. I was dreaming last night, and in my dream I remember saying that I needed to blog about the events that had just happened. True to real life I don't remember what I was dreaming about that I needed to blog about.

Blogging has become a little more difficult for me. I feel a responsibility to produce interesting,funny, emotional and poignant blogs to entertain my three readers. Problem is, my life is not always interesting and funny or poignant. Sometimes I start writing something and quit halfway through because it doesn't seem like something anyone would want to read.

I blog under the assumption that I should have a blog theme. Entries that pertain to a certain subject. I think that's is what makes it difficult. In my mind I try to put things in a well defined box, but my blog is not about one thing. It's totally random. Like me! Light bulb moment.....That is my theme: random.

I feel so much better. I have a theme. My first blog two years ago addressed the question of a theme, now two years later it is finally defined. This may be confusing to some people but in my mind it makes total sense. I have continued direction for my blog. I was running out of energy and now I have renewed energy.

In a nut shell; you never know what you are going to get. It may be funny or it may be totally stupid. It may be an entire page, or it may be one sentence.

So you see, writing this blog now makes it ok for me to write something completely lame and it won't matter because now you know what you are getting in to, and you are reading of your own free will.

You have been warned.